Saturday, October 13, 2012

Joel & Cheryl Davis - They're Just Somebody That You Ought To Know!

Every now and then I'm going to highlight some people I really admire, probably people I know, people who really make a difference in the world around them. I will try not to gush but make no promises.

I'd heard of Joel & Cheryl Davis for a year or two before I really met them. I'd seen them; we had even interacted a little. But in that sense, I meet a lot of people-- some whom I still don't know, some I haven't seen since.

While we'd been involved with teenagers and some college age people, mostly in the Round Rock area, they'd been involved with Baylor students. I think some weekends they had 10% of Baylor in their home. My kind of people.

The Davises got caught up in the same whirlwind I was caught in, hanging around Bill & Traci Vanderbush. While our paths into ministry, into playing parent to far more young people than we could possibly have conceived or birthed in a lifetime, and in hanging out with the Vanderbi were very different, there we were. In Houston. At a conference. In the most delicious, God set up ambush sort of trial by fire, getting to love on and bless a thousand people or more. Representing not just Bill, but world famous ministers and God. Along with the rest of us on the team, Joel and Cheryl took deep breaths, grinned, and dove into the deep end.

A few months later, same scenario, we were in Batson, Texas (motto: "If you can find us, we'll give you some doggone good pie!") doing the same thing. Only this time it was for dozens. The thing I loved about them the most that weekend was that they had the same level of enthusiasm and passion for the dozens as they had for the thousand plus.

Cheryl's a serious extrovert, and the more obvious "minister". Joel's much quieter, often looking at things with a businessman's eye, not to get rich off anyone, but seeking ways to truly improve things for people. He's happy to let Cheryl be in the limelight and stay in the background most of the time, but they're both powerful, joyous, loving people. They're a potent team. They're as happy down in the mud with Romas who've just had what little they had taken away as with a country's national level leaders. You can sometimes find them in both position in the same day.

They fell in love with a country most Americans haven't heard of except in movies or the Harry Potter books, Albania. For most of us, it's a myth or it's a scary place (Think the thugs in Taken or Lord Voldemort's recovery room). In reality it's a beautiful flower on the Mediterranean, snuggled between Greece and Italy, a country recovering in uncertain times from communism and dictatorship, one of God's own jewels, hidden away for now.

After one of their trips there, Cheryl mentioned something about it to to me, and I had a vision (I've described it elsewhere). I knew I had to go. Albania was calling me.

That June, I went. The Davis's idea of a mission trip was unlike anything I'd heard of. While there were things that were scheduled, there was plenty of time for fun and to just do what you felt led to do. And we were always up for ministry, at castles, restaurants, the beach. Nowhere was off limits. One day some of us went to a park and played music and sang and just loved on and shared with and prayed for the people who showed up. We went to several beaches. We worked closely with Genti, pastor of Ray of Light Church in Tirana. On the way to or from a planned event or something else, we might stop a half dozen times to hug people, pray for them, bless them, etc. When we worked with the Albanians, it was their show; we were there to support them, not take over and tell them how to do it.

Cheryl and Joel people are gold miners. When they look at you, they want to see what God sees. They look for the gold-- the good, the beautiful, the precious, the lasting things. They dig lovingly for this gold, to bring it to the surface. "Look. This is what and who you are. Not all the other stuff. This."

I felt out of sorts after a few days in Albania. I really wanted to contribute, to make a difference. I know my gifts. I know who I am, what I'm good at, what I'm called to. And I was trying really hard to do those things... and getting nowhere. I felt pointless. Few things have bugged me more.

When I brought this all up, Cheryl and Joel (and Melody Carson!) immediately saw the problem. "Quit trying so hard. You don't have to do anything. Just do what you do best, be. Be you, be Miles. That's the best thing you can do for Albania." This is the sort of thing I'd told lots of people, especially young people, over the years. And as always happens, it came home to roost.

They were right, of course. It transformed not just the rest of the trip, but my life. I made ten times more connections, and ministered to ten times more people, the second half of the trip. All because I quit trying to do anything. I was just me. "God doesn't make mistakes." How many time had I said that to people to encourage them to just be themselves... Now I was living it more than ever.

I've watched them do this sort of thing over and over and over.

Another huge thing was when I realized that the vision I had as a result of the vision Cheryl first shared with me was not the same vision she had, there was no problem. I support theirs, they support mine. Instead of competing, we look for what glorifies God, what will bless Albania. We work together. Far too many times I've seen this disintegrate relationships, when one or both parties feels they have to be "the right one".

I pray each and every one of you has a Joel and Cheryl in your life. And that you are, or become, such a person to others. If you don't think that's possible, maybe it's time to find out who you really are and just be you. Quit trying so hard to do stuff, or even to be somebody, whether that's someone else or yourself. Just do it. Just be.

And if you're having a hard time with that, I know who you can talk to.

Wednesday, October 03, 2012

I Need a Friendly Frost Giant

I need a friendly frost giant.

I need one in my car.

I need one in my pocket.

Why do I need a frost giant in my car? To cool it off, of course.

The previous Mazda 3 had marginal air conditioning for a Texas summer. If the car didn't sit in the sun too long, the A/C was fine. If it got very hot, the A/C would eventually be fine, but it could take a loooong time to initially cool the car down. On a 105 degree day, parking in the sun for an hour meant the A/C blew warm the first few minutes, cool another five, and after ten was blowing cold air. By then you could be soaked. The only saving grace twas that by the time the temperature was that high, the humidity was low. I usually drove home with the air off and windows down; evaporative cooling worked better than the A/C those days.

Our new 3, a five door, has a larger passenger compartment (18% bigger because storage is inside, not in the trunk), has the same A/C, which struggles even harder.

Mazda is hardly alone in this. Most cars apparently are neither designed for, nor tested in, climates like those of the southern US.

 

Why do I need a frost giant in my pocket? To cool my phone off, of course.

My smart phone already has plenty of problems, documented elsewhere. But another problem is that it just can't cope with the Texas heat. If it's in my pocket or a fanny pack (while running) on a 100+ degree day for even a half hour, it needs to be shut off and put somewhere cool for a bit or (a) the battery discharges crazily fast and (b) the phone just locks up.

 

This is poor design and poor testing. I don't know the actual numbers, but a decent percentage of North American car and phone customers (among others) live in climates that get pretty hot or pretty cold. The products need to be designed and tested for these extremes.

We should all be demanding this of the manufacturers and voting with our dollars.

 

Recommendations for well designed, climate robust products welcome.

Tuesday, October 02, 2012

This is Not the Droid You Are Looking For

Last summer I bought my first smart phone. All my friends ragged on me for getting such a small one until I dunked it in a glass of ice water and then used it. The Droid's claim to fame was that it was nearly indestructible-- water resistant, sand resistant, a screen made of Gorilla[tm] Glass, etc.

It ended up having a few problems. Occasionally calls were scrambled, sounding like a demented modem or FAX machine rather than voices.

It would sometimes slow down to the point of uselessness when running an app (especially Facebook, but others as well), requiring a reboot (a nearly two minute process, sometimes requiring battery removal).

The camera was so so at best, especially with bright lights or at night. Video was 640x480 with no zoom. These problems I knew about beforehand, but they were still more annoying in real life than they sounded in reviews.

Other people had the same problems. A few had hacked their phones and installed newer versions of the Android OS resulting in much better behaved phones, at the cost of a voided warranty.

The call scrambling and slowdowns got worse with time. When I realized I was rebooting the phone several times every day I took it back to T-Mobile.

It turns out that a one year warranty only obligates them to replace the phone for free-- not pay for shipping. And the provider couldn't simply swap phones; Motorola had to do the replacing. For a $20 shipping and handling fee fee.

(I could have gotten the extended warranty at $8 a month (30% of the phone cost over the time to pay it off). That would cover the $20 shipping. It seemed excessive. In retrospect it was a steal, because the phone was over-priced near junk.)

The local T-Mobile store offered to cover the $20 fee.

And of course the replacement was a refurb, not a new phone.

I took the replacement back two days later. It was worse than the original. I had to wonder if it was even refurbed, or simply shipped straight from another dissatisfied customer's local store to me.

T-Mobile covered the shipping again. I really appreciate T-Mobile.

The third phone was the best of the lot in terms of the problems so far, but...

The camera was worse in low light conditions.

Getting wet meant the mic or speaker didn't work properly for a few hours.

The back no longer stayed latched, which (a) is annoying and (b) means the camera is no longer water proof of dust proof.

The third phone had showed up just before the one year warranty expired, and I discovered the back fit problem several days after that.

I spent several hours backing up, reloading, re-installing apps, re-syncing with each phone. And of course each transition lost some contacts despite my following instructions to the letter. At least the photos hung around.

Motorola only released one OS update, a few months after the Droid came out. This update was necessary for many apps (including many social media apps), but was less reliable than the original! After that their answer was, "buy a new phone". The old model was a year old, I had owned mine for six months, and their answer to a fairly pricey phone's problems is, "buy a new phone"?

At this point, I'm probably going to hack the phone and install a new OS. It's out of warranty so I have little to lose. It's almost paid for. Almost.

If I'm not happy with the new OS, my only option is to get a new phone.

I can guarantee you it will not be a Motorola.

I still haven't decided if I want to ebay this one or just take it out and shoot it. If I shoot it, I will ship the pieces to Moto's VP of marketing. Maybe I'll ship them an extra cartridge as well. "In case you need to shoot your own phone. Unless you have an iPhone. I hear those work quite well."

I remember when Motorola was the communication device standard. Now they're a second rate Evil Empire in my book. At least Darth Vader's hardware and software seemed to work.

Sunday, September 30, 2012

World's Most Beautiful Iguana Gets Married!

Another Saturday, another wedding. I told people we were going to see the world's most beautiful iguana get married.

Let me be clear. Cristina Santiago (now Farnham) is not an iguana. She is a beautiful, brilliant, young lady, despite being an Aggie.

Her parents, Jose and Gladys, both hail from Puerto Rico. Years ago, our families were in the same home group, a sort of house church as part of a "normal" church. Another friend, whom we shall call Bill for purposes of this story, often asked Jose how to say words in Spanish. At one meeting we somehow ended up on the topic of iguanas.

"Jose, how do you say, 'iguana' in Spanish?"
All heads turned their way. Time stood still. Once it started moving again, Jose replied in perfect deadpan.
"Iguana."

Bill slowly turned red as we all lost it. Since that day, any time the three families get together, iguanas come up. Hence, my "beautiful iguana wedding" reference.

Unlike last Saturday's wedding (What if They Threw a Wedding and Nobody Came?) this one was thoroughly planned, not simply thrown. With both parents being top notch doctors, this is no surprise. Doctors tend to be methodical and prepared. (I did think having to provide vaccination records to get in the door was a little over the top.)

Today's wedding was traditional-- very traditional in many ways. But it caught me off guard because it was very personal. The traditions were celebrated in the beauty of their original intent rather than simply because "that's how my mother did it, and her mother did it, and her mother did it, and how the past 9,029 monthly editions of Modern Bride said to do it."

The pastor was formal in a casual, personal sort of way-- very Texan. He was also large and muscular with a shaved head, and would not have looked out of place as an enforcer in Ocean's Eleven, except that he had a smile as big and real as the Texas panhandle.

The charge, vows and ring exchange were eloquently succinct, yet still covered everything they traditionally cover.

When Thomas and Cristina took communion, it was very personal and holy, while the excellent string trio played something perfect, and played it perfectly (technical perfection and soul!). God was smack dab in the middle of everything, having a good time.

Approximately half the people present were in the wedding party. Almost all the groomsmen were Thomas's brothers; I didn't have time to count them but I suspect Rhode Island is smaller. He also had Alex Santiago with him, as well as someone nobody knew, but he brought his own tux so he was in. This of course meant that Cristina had most of her Texas A&M graduating class standing with her, plus two extra beauties, Amarillys Santiago and Ariella Hannon.

Afterward we had an excellent meal (featuring what I am almost certain was roast iguana) and dancing, including music from the country western tradition, the rap and hip hop traditions, and the Macarena tradition. The latter is so traditional that I was nervous at a recent wedding that didn't include the Macarena; I feared the Macarena Authority would round us up and haul us off to jail.

The speeches were wonderful. Jose summed up the only two qualities he really looked for in someone wanting to marry his daughter. "He must love God, and he must love Cristina. Other than that, I don't care what or who you are, you have my blessing."

Two of the non-traditional pieces were in lieu of a guest book. One was a hand-drawn tree on which we could put our fingerprints and names. Next to this were cards where we could write Bible verses we wanted to share with the bride and groom. I picked Matthew 22/36-40, the two greatest commandments: "Love God with everything in you and love each other as yourselves". I would like to note that I wrote mine before Jose said his piece, the copycat.

Last Saturday's and this one's weddings were perfect (identical at the core if very different in appearance) bookends for my week. I just wish I had felt like dancing more this week. Except the Macarena. I would still have sat that one out. If my wife can't find me in the morning, someone have her call the Macarena Authority to arrange bail..

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Occupy Your Destiny!

If you're going after it, you have a vision. If you just sit around and wish it would happen, you only have a fantasy.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Wanna know how I got these scars?

Wanna know how I got these scars?

My father...
was a pop radio fan.
And a Star Trek fannn...
Sometimes...
he would play the same songs...
over, and over and over...
For hours.
Captain Kirk singing the Beatles.
Captain Kirk singing Bob Dylan.
Mr. Spock singing, "Ruby, Don't Take Your Love to Town."
Captain Kirk singing, "Rocket Mannnn..."
And about the 300th time I heard Kirk scream, "Hey, Mister Tambourine Man!" in 48 hours...
I just couldn't take it any more...
And I took these knives...
And I made myself scream so loud the neighbors couldn't hear Captain Kirk...
The neighbors lived three counties away...
They thank me to this day...


Inspired by Lisa Mikitarian, though she may not want that known.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Go To College Or Die!

Modern American society says we must go to college. The schools push it. Relatives push it. Business pushes it. "If you don't go to college, you'll be at McDonalds for the rest of your life!" That would actually motivate me-- if I believed it.

I dropped out of college more than once, eventually flunking out. I had far too little motivation and I didn't fit into the mold. The fact that many universities throw as many people into introductory calculus classes as the fire code allows, with professors (or TAs) who don't seem to care and/or have less than ideal communication skills, didn't help.

Between a lot of self study and a couple of top notch profs I still learned enough to carve out good careers in the software industry and later in IT. Technically I attended college-- but I came away with no long term debt, no degree, and far less than 4 full years of my life invested. How did this happen?

  1. The industry was right (software);
  2. small businesses typically care far more about capability than degrees;
  3. I had the chops;
  4. divine provision;
  5. college was much cheaper;
  6. the few loans I had were short term (payable during the term);
  7. support of friends and family.
Not necessarily in that order.

I recommend people go to college if and only if they have a real reason to go to college. If you do need to go, is it because you need a degree, or because you simply need specific courses?

If you're self-motivated and have a passion and gifts that don't require college (or a degree), it's optional. If you want to start your own business a course or two here or there may help but you will figure this out as you go. If you're good with your hands and content with a day job in construction, plumbing, landscaping, retail sales, restaurants, or lots of other things, there's no point in spending the time and money for college-- unless you just can't find any other social scene to fill a specific void.

Look at where your passions, gifts/talents and calling/purpose converge. If you can make the money you need/want somewhere near that intersection, go for that-- including college if you need it to get to specific jobs. Otherwise, find a way to support yourself in something that will maintain the lifestyle you want, that won't suck the life out of you, and spend the rest of your time near that intersection. If you need college for whatever the bill paying job is, go to college.

If you need college, a two year or small, four year college may work just fine. Community colleges are also great ways to get basic courses at far less cost, in far better environments (smaller classes, profs who care). Don't assume you need to go to a pricey university. Trust me, if you really need to go to one of those, you'll know.

You can learn a lot from a college or university. You can make lifelong friends. You can invest in your future, and get a great career out of it.

You can also waste several key years of your life and a lot of money (from $10,000 to $250,000) and/or end up in that much debt, with a job paying next to nothing.

Choose wisely.